Oh, place your hands...

Game 9 of the season rolled around with the Mighty Men's 4s posting a much-changed line-up from the previous week's thumping of Formby.

Excuses this week included:

• Man Flu (very deadly in all known cases and not a laughing matter)
• Recruitment to the Men's 3s (to teach them finally how to win)
• Shoulder surgery (excessive use over the years....)
• Winter Holiday (not even skiing so no idea why)
• "I promised the Mrs a weekend for her" (enough said)
• "I belong to a secret society that I can’t talk about but it is very important I attend this event you can't know about" (nudge nudge, wink wink, secret hand shake).

So with no Mini, no Paul and no Grim, the much better looking 4s line-up arrived at Fortress Armitage with one thing on their mind - who was going to do something stupid to get DoD this week?!

After early shouts from a Grim turning up at the meet to bring match day kit yet still couldn't play the game, a very late Matty Paine and our resident Saffa on a hat-trick of hat-tricks and a hat-trick of DoDs making outlandish claims he plays better if he doesn't train; the stand in skip for the week duly set everyone's nerves to rest by getting a 'hands in' on the 1-2-3 Didsbury pre-match chant. This did not impress the germophobic Men’s 4s who much rather rub their sticks together than show any signs of intimacy.

With DoD secured, the 4s started the game well with their traditional high pressure and intensity creating chance after chance against a Horwich opposition including the likes of ‘Irish’, ‘Pikey’ and Paul’s ‘Blackpool Friend’.

The deadlock was broken by Didsbury with a short corner routine found in the back of every team’s play book; injection mistakenly sent to stopper’s strong side, stopper must stumble round and get control of the ball, stopper casually slides the ball into the bottom corner of the net. 1-0 Didsbury with Ben Barnes showing the forwards just how it’s done.

Didsbury continued to move the ball around the pitch with Paine spraying passes like the embodiment of Richard Mantel mixed with Tiger Woods – at times opting for the 9 iron to clear the Horwich press.

As the sun started to set, Horwich began to get a foot-hold in the game and started to create a few chances of their own and drew the scores level with a well worked short corner, 1-1. Didsbury continued to press, peppering the Horwich D with attach after attack yet the Mighty 4s could not make the pressure count.

Horwich started to build in belief that they might make it out of Fortress Armitage with something other than a good hiding and against the run of play hit Didsbury on the counter; 1-2 Horwich. Half-time.

A very unimpressed (stand-in) skip, not keen to be the 1st captain to lose a game for the Men’s 4s this season, set about the team talk to the troops to put a rocket up their arse to get a response, even leaving the Haribo back in the dug-out.

The talk seemed to stir something in the men as Didsbury raced out of the blocks at the start of the 2nd half with Robin driving across the D and lashing a shot goalward. The Horwich Keeper leapt like a salmon but could only turn the ball up into the air at the far post for Andy to duly tap home. 2-2. Game on.

With momentum on their side, Didsbury didn’t sit back and locked to find a 3rd and oh what a goal it was. The capacity crowd will be telling their grandkids of this for years to come. Dunny stole the ball in the centre of the pitch and after hurdling the falling Horwich midfielder drove towards the D. The opposition dropped back to cover the options leaving him little choice but to switch the ball on to his reverse as he crossed the magic white line and duly smash the ball into the bottom corner of the goal. Keeper and defence stood no chance. 3-2 Didsbury.

Horwich didn’t let this deter them though and continued to cause Didsbury problems on the counter leading Keeper Kit to make several saves to keep Didsbury honest. However, somehow Horwich found a way through; one of their players spinning in the D (sadly more 18-wheeler truck than Fynny esc) and finding the bottom corner. 3-3.

Didsbury went searching for the winner with short corner after short corner but couldn’t find a way through.

With 5 minutes to go Didsbury were reduced to 10 men with Barnes seeing yellow for stopping a 6 on 3 Horwich counter. The umpire was apparently rather apologetic about having to produce it.

Both teams appeared to be happy to play out the final few minutes for the drew. 3-3 it ended.

While to many of the Mighty Men’s 4s the draw felt like a defeat, the undefeated season rolls, still clear at the top of the league approaching the Christmas break.

FINAL SCORE: Didsbury Northern 4s 3-3 Horwich 1s

Goals:
Ben Barnes x 1
Andy Devine x 1
Dunny x 1

MoM: Dunny – that goal!

DoD: Dunny – the team does not hold hands!

Opta Match Stats:
Attendance: 3
Haribo consumed: 0